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Sunday, March 25, 2012

Shameless


I know, I know, you are all asking yourselves, "Now, where on earth might I be so lucky as to find such a fine, long-sleeved t-shirt such as this, without having to walk to the very ends of the globe, in order to find one?" 

Panic ye not, help is at hand - our very own talented and gifted artist, Chewy, has availed a whole multitude of her brilliant designs, all ready for the picking from her Red Bubble shop.  This latest one I am sporting comes in all colours and styles, from t-shirt to hoodie, so you can go trot on over there without delay, to pick out whatever delight your little heart might desire!  Me?  I've limited myself to three, and this one here, it isn't even my most favourite one.  Go and have yourself a gander over there, I promise you, you will not be disappointed. 

And swiftly moving on..

Chantel wrote an intruging post this week, about people-watching, and mostly of how what people tend to do with their hands, tells much about them.  It made me laugh (a little hysterically, as I slightly shuddered) to think of what my hands must say of me.

I have my mother's hands, though perhaps a little less chafed and worn.

My fingers are long, good for the piano, so I am told (not that I play) -  my nails are strong, they rarely break, and as I have never been a nail-biter, I file them to stunt their growth.   I apply polish, but never coloured, just a natural, transparent shine.  I don't like this present trend for square-set nails; mine I fashion oval, shaped smooth with an emery board, with no sharp edges to catch or tear.   

These days I prefer not to call too much attention to these hands of mine, they've come to reflect my age much too accurately.  

Recently I've taken to creaming them last thing at night, in bed, before turning out the light.  Actually, I've taken to creaming more or less every other part of me too, but most especially my feet and hands, it's soothing, a comfort to me at the end of my day. 

It's a long-standing family joke that I'd be mute, were my hands ever bound.  Yes, I am tactile, must touch as I talk, but more than that, I find it near impossible to express myself without also flinging my hands up or down, pointing and gesticulating this way and that, unconsciously miming out the actions to my words.

It often gets me in trouble.

Not everyone likes their personal space invaded.  Likewise, some can mis-interpret my way of interacting with others as over friendly, and become either threatened (backing off, body language screaming, "I've got a girlfriend/husband/dog/leave me alone, you stupid, scary nutter) or even mis-reading my signs altogether, believing I'm really saying, "Yes, of course I'm a complete and utter slag, and I simply can't wait to jump in to the sack with you" (invariably leading to disappointment on both sides).

Ironic then, that I of all people, should have had to have a son who usually cringes at the slightest touch, isn't it?  Spontaneous hugs are as scalding water to him.  Maybe he is my lesson in life, to stop and think before always following through?  That said, he is the only one who's ever LITERALLY allowed me to talk with my hands.  In his earlier years, with he then non-verbal, our best method of communication came through signing. We used Makaton - signs combined with facial expression, gesture and speech, to help to aid us in our joint communication.

(Hmmmn... come to think of it now, and over18 years down the line, maybe some of the blame for this way I've come about, should actually be laid squarely at his door?)

And as to people watching.. 

I used to enjoy that a lot, I think most do.  But as I said to Chantel, maybe I overdosed a bit on that, when it became my main means of earning a living. 

Nowadays, I'm happier tuning out the odd character I may trip across as I venture down the supermarket aisle.  Um, actually (blush) I shop on-line, which kinda' rests my case, doesn't it? It's not so much that I'm anti-social, 'cos I'm not, not really, I'm just.. well, weary, is all.

See, people don't surprise me much, anymore.  And I no longer have the patience I once had.  Years of training, combined with instinct, has turned me into a virtual (happy) house hermit, these days.  Sure, I am still curious about the world, just not so much interested in the kind of folk who inhabit it, is all.  I can't be arsed with the necessary games required to play - and face it,  we ALL indulge in them, whether few or many. 

It takes a lot of fun out of encounters, when you're groomed to pick up on most of that guff.  Saps the energy.

I have tired of people watching.

Maybe this is why I blog.  Our community has a nose for an impostor, and soon roots them out, there is less to dress, and we cut through the dancing. 

Och, I'm not blaming anyone, it's me who interviews most folks to the death, reading every white lie as it comes.  Can't help it, more's the pity. 

But now retired, I am happiest limiting my day to day doings investing mostly in those with whom I love -  all said and done, aren't they always the easiest ones for us to blindly forgive?

57 comments:

Anthony Duce said...

I enjoyed the read very much. I type this out only because you can’t see my hands☺

Kate said...

Great thoughts, dear Shrinky. Our faces can lie, but those hands. I detest mine as they get uglier by the year. No amount of cream seems to help and my horse-keeping is very hard on them. Investing in those you love is always the proper course. Thanks for this great post!

bill lisleman said...

idle hands - there's some dumb saying about them right?
Not too long ago I smacked a relative in the nose. She ventured into the arm waving danger zone. I enjoyed your train of thought here - and I didn't need to buy a ticket.

ellen abbott said...

oh, I talk with my hands too, often gesturing wildly.

Ms. A said...

"Sure, I am still curious about the world, just not so much interested in the kind of folk who inhabit it, is all".

AMEN!

chewy said...

No wonder my ears were burning!

Ami said...

Ever read Snow Falling on Cedars?

I am terrible with remembering names, so can't tell you the name of the protagonist, but I LOVE LOVE LOVE this line...

"Bob loved humanity, but he hated people."

Call me Bob.

Vince said...

At one time in my live my living depended on being good at understanding people. People being very rich people. People that could afford to do their environment like god would have done had he the money. The problem was Stockholm syndrome, one spent so much of ones time in another's life you forgot your own.
Nowadays, I tend to unsubscribe people I consider cruel, for of all the indicators that's the one that's most true to type. If someone is nasty to animals then it's a short step. And the corollary, if someone adores/ed their pets they are good in my book regardless what other reports.

What I've always found amasing, we've people with huge sections of their brain unresponsive from birth who will scream on being touched. But will allow a dog wash their face, ride a horse bareback and giggle when dolphins nuzzle up to their bodies.
But more than that, the animals seem to know they need protecting.

The Future Was Yesterday said...

no longer have the patience I once had.

Patience - that'a what parents have when there are witnesses, isn't it?:)

Chantel said...

LOL at Future!!

Ah love, I can indeed understand your reluctance to engage humanity--I think this is why much of my people watching is done from a distance, no contact desired!

My hands are quite scarred--my husband says I have tender skin like a woman but am addicted to mens work. *chuckle*

Secret Agent Woman said...

I'm a hand talker, too - and I actually find it more compelling to listent to people who use their hands when they talk.

Leslie: said...

I went and bought some special cream for my hands, arms, legs, well the entire bod since I'm starting to look a bit crepey! (no not creepy...crepe, as in papery) *sigh* Anyhoo...we'll have to back away from each other when I arrive or else we'll each be getting constantly smacked in the head! lol

wishihadakarmaanghia said...

Lovely post! Makaton has a lot to answer for - I once upset a friend when signing - drunkenly, in a noisy pub - that I was going to the ladies. Ha ha! I know what you mean about an interest in people watching waning but I recently stood on the concourse of Waterloo Station waiting for someone and I was right back there! It was totally fascinating. As for those visual boys of ours... I love Vince's comment - a lot of truth in that.
xxx

Shrinky said...

Ha, Anthony (swat), very witty!

Shrinky said...

Cheers for that, Kate. Yeah, I used to be proud of my hands, but thesedays, I prefer to keep them hidden from sight, thrust deep in my pockets (sigh).

Shrinky said...

Oooh Bill, that relative of yours needs to develop faster reflexes, huh? Idle hands are the devil's work, or something, isn't that what they say?

Shrinky said...

You too, Ellen? Then I'm in good company (smile).

Shrinky said...

Hahahaha - you are a woman after my own heart, Ms A!

Shrinky said...

Ach, t'was all good about you, Chewy.. (wink)

Shrinky said...

No Ami (or should I call you Bob?), can't say as I've read that book, but I sure can empathise with his sentiments, at times!

Shrinky said...

Oh Vince, you've really tapped into the truth there - it's amazing how patient and forgiving our great big lunk of a hound is around our Sam. He readily submits to being Sam's beanbag, despite his clumsy ways. Sam also did "horse-riding for the disabled", and got so much back from it, but unfortunately they wanted to train him up for the special olympics, and it was all a bit too much of a prospect for him. Shame folk saw the need to introduce competition into it, as it ruined the whole exercise for him (not that we agreed, or that they insisted, or anything, but the seeds of fear were planted, and he refused to ever go back again).

Shrinky said...

You are a wicked, but witty man, dearest Dan - hehe..!

Shrinky said...

Chantel, dear lady, you should display each and every one of those scars with pride, sounds to me like you've worked very hard to earn them!

I hear what you say about your people watching being the most enjoyable at a distance (smile)..

Shrinky said...

Yeah, Secret Agent, I tend to agree with you on that - tho' I guess I am slightly biased on that front..?

Shrinky said...

Ha, oh the more I hear, the more I'm looking forward to our September ger-together, Leslie (grin)!

Shrinky said...

Well hello there, bonny lass, it's so great to see you again, Kristina! How's it going? Are you still working? Hope that brood of yours are behaving themselves? Ah, yeah, I loved how Vince picked up on that too, and he is so right, isn't he? OMG, that is so funny about you in the pub - only you! Haaaaaaaaaaaa.. 'course, folks like us are so long past ever being embarrased by now, we easily forget our friends aren't (wink).

Furtheron said...

I'm like you I gesticulate a lot when talking... I said GESTICULATE madame. Thank you.

It is not unknown for stuff to go clattering about me when I'm on the phone, I think this is because it is an auditory only medium for some reason I have to overemphasise the hand gestures even more!

mythopolis said...

On a morning news show here in the states, A woman who was an expert on hand care recommended that you take a glob of lard and rub it all over your hands. Then you put on a pair of rubber gloves and sleep in them all night. In the morning your hands will be amazingly soft! Sounds like kinky fun to me!!

Sandi McBride said...

I'm laughing, because I could have written this...hands tied no talk...hands like my mothers...but just as worn and chafed because I don't take care of them...now let me go sit on my hands...they aren't fit to be seen!
Sandi

Akelamalu said...

For the first time in my life I have nails - which I paint dayglo colours! Shame most of my fingers are have swollen and twisted knuckles due to arthritis. Sod's Law ain't it?

Bijoux said...

I'm married to a hand talker. The only time it bothers me is when he's sitting in a chair and he will constantly slam his hands down on the arms, which really distracts me from what he's saying.

I feel the same way about my hands and nails and take care of mine like you do.

Shrinky said...

Oh God, YES, Furtheron, it takes so much energy to talk down the phone, doesn't it? (Giggle)

Shrinky said...

Hi there Dan, I've heard this before, only with vaseline! I don't think this would work for me, I'd get the pages on my book too greasy - I usually fall asleep reading in bed (and wake up with a crik in my neck)!

Shrinky said...

Haha, Sandi, we girlies should stick together..!

Shrinky said...

Way to go, Pearl, I LOVE that image of you with your dayglow fingernails!

Shrinky said...

Bijoux, you've just promped another post for me, 'cept I can't publish it for fear of hurting my hubby's feelings - he has this REALLY annoying habit of hand-holding as we watch the telly, and it drives me NUTS, 'cos I can't work my laptop then (which is one of the reasons I am sure he does it)!!

Suldog said...

Hands. I know what you mean. I think of myself as still being in my teens or twenties, but then I look at my hands when I'm driving or whatnot and I see my grandfather's paws, veins and wrinkles becoming prominent.

I should wear gloves all the time, then I can retain my delusions.

Helena said...

Hands are very experssive, and can send important messages to their owner, too- when I am going 'up' in the bipolar zigzag I talk more, and before I notice, I'll notice that my hands are gesticulating more! SO they are a good alarm bell for me to go fetch one of my little white pilss :)

And how great that Chewy is selling her wonderful art like that!!! I did look into a 'print and pay' type site for Bob, but the prices were very high. I might research again.

You're looking great, btw!

Helena said...

Pills, not pilss. Isn't that a lager? LOL

Grayquill said...

I too am a hand talker. I find it werid (when I am aware) that my hand waving increases or decreases with the mood I am in. If I am blue - not so much hand waving. If I am excited, keep your distance,

Sridhar Jagannathan said...

Long fingers, strong nails - you could be dangerous if you wanted to good that you retired (or maybe that's the cover your agency wants you to have).

Nice t-shirt!

Skunkfeathers said...

I spend so much time people watching at work, I tend to watch inanimate objects away from work. It might sound strange.

It probably is.

Shrinky said...

You and me alike, Sully!

Shrinky said...

You should definitely go for it, Helena, I think it's a fab idea (grin).

Shrinky said...

Now you come to mention it, GQ, I think there is a lot to that - if you're not much engaged with the day, even hand waving gets too much of an effort..

Shrinky said...

Hi there SJ, och, I'm more a danger to myself these days, than to any one else (more's the pity)!

Shrinky said...

Well Skunk, SOMEONE'S got to keep an eye on Seymour..

Margaret Benbow said...

I know what you mean about being weary of engaging with people, just because so many of them can be dishonest or ignorant or unkind. But it makes me respect those with good hearts and real minds all the more. (Among whom, I definitely include you!)

Hey Shrinky, are you sure you weren't an American Southern belle in some past life? They have the reputation of slathering on the floral body lotion as a daily routine! Must make their husbands happy.

Barbara said...

I do most of my ordering online, too, these days. I love people, but I also love staying home and having time to myself... (be grateful for those tough nails!)

Shrinky said...

Hi there, Margaret, it always makes my day when you stop by! Oh, yes, of course there are some WONDERFUL people around, and I'm blessed to know many, but I'm no longer curious about strangers just for the sake of it, I have limited time and energy left to invest in these things, nowadays(shrug).

Shrinky said...

Hi Barbara, yes, the internet has truly revolutionised the way we choose to shop these days, hasn't it? I could never go back to the "old days" again (smile). Oh yes, I DO give thanks for these tough claws of mine, but I also think most folk could have likewise, if they also took a daily supplememnt of Lecothin granuales on a daily basis (it strengthens the hair, too)!

Fenstar de Luxe said...

I don't think I could ever tire of people watching. It's great for the imagination!

Shrinky said...

Ah, the optimism of youth.. give it time, Fen, give it time!

Bone said...

I've been described as constantly at motion. My hands are always drumming or my feet are tapping or I'm humming some song, real or imagined.

I also profess to be a hermit. Is profess the right word? Maybe desire is a better choice.

But right now, all I'm thinking is how badly I need an emery board for these nails.

Shrinky said...

I've sent a message out, the Red Cross are winging you a package of emery boards out as I type, Bone. Erm, you may want to lay rocks out from your hermitage, to be seen from the air? Failing that, I guess they will spot the gesticulating, foot tapping, arms flailing, off-key singing guy, even from 10,000 feet up..

Pat Tillett said...

I totally talk with my hands when I'm excited. They are like crazy birds flying around me. However, in a business setting, I never gestured with my hands.

What I did for a living, made it imperative that I be able to read people. I always thought that sometimes their hands told the truth while the rest of them was MSU (making shit up).

s.m. said...

Happy Easter!
to You and your family!